Bouncing Bosoms, Bloody Mayhem in Piranha 3dd

"Welcome to rock bottom," muses star David Hasselhoff, playing David Hasselhoff, to himself in a moment of pained, ironic self-reflection.

The former Baywatch beefcake is on hand to give a little star appeal to opening day of an Arizona water park not too far from where, a year earlier, a school of prehistoric piranha was unleashed and feasted upon scores of cavorting co-eds (briefly recapped in the film's opening moments to add a sense of continuity to this senseless sequel).

In the first Piranha , Richard Dreyfuss provided the opening cameo before becoming fish food. This time, it's Gary Busey who does the, um, honours, uttering the immortal "Holy flying baby s----" before his well-deserved demise. (Continuity is apparently important to the people behind the Piranha franchise, but surely Busey is quite a step down from Dreyfuss.) Christopher Lloyd reprises his wild-eyed role - the only kind he ever seems to play - as a marine biologist who sees the impending danger, and there's the return of a much-diminished Ving Rhames (his legs were eaten in the first one), providing, yes, even more continuity for drive-in theatre owners shopping around for a double bill.

The rest is jiggling boobs provided by "water-certified strippers," some below-the-waist nudity, loads of salty language, hoary dialogue ("I don't want to die a virgin," one busty damsel laments) and, from stem to stern, a tidal wave of gross-out humour (including a dismembered member).

So Piranha 3DD ("Double D's swim for free," says water park co-owner Chet, played with sleazy relish by David Koechner) trolls pretty much the same waters as its predecessor, which should delight the same adolescents and arrested adolescents who filled theatres the first time around.

Yes, as one character notes, "there's something in the water" all right, and apparently it's making movies (and audiences) progressively more stupid.

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